The Inner Dialogue of an Indie Author

Me: There are errors in the novel.

InnerMe: Errors? Like what? You accidentally killed off somebody in Chapter 16? “Everything came to a screeching halt when, the next morning, Bekah woke up dead…”

Me: Aren’t you funny. No, the story’s solid. I mean formatting errors. And some typos.

InnerMe: You knew that would happen.

Me: But that doesn’t mean I wanted it to.

InnerMe: And you’re going to get them corrected.

Me: But there will still be copies floating around with errors!

InnerMe: But your whole story is about how you don’t have to be perfect!

Me: Well, yeah, but I’m not selling these copies to God. People are notoriously lax when it comes to extending grace toward novels.

InnerMe: Ahem. Like… you?

Me: What?

InnerMe: Let’s discuss the books you’ve verbally shredded over the years because they didn’t meet your exalted standards…

Me: Let’s don’t.

InnerMe: Twiiiiliiiight….

Me: Shut up! I said my story is solid! Twilight has some serious plot problems, like…

InnerMe: Forget I mentioned it. Please. All I’m saying is that you might be dreading a taste of your own medicine.

Me: That’s a cliche.

InnerMe: If the shoe fits…

Me: I can’t believe my inner voice speaks in cliches!

InnerMe: Seriously, are you just going to sit around stewing about some errors that you’re going to fix but can’t right at this moment?

Me: Well… I could stew about the fact that the house is a wreck too.

InnerMe: The house is always messy.

Me: I know, and I’m fine with that in general. But it’s reached a unacceptable level of messy.

InnerMe: We can fix that! Right now!

Me: Yes! You are totally right! CONQUER THE MESS!

InnerMe: And… sorry about the cliches.

Me: It’s okay. It’s the thought that counts. Oh my gosh, did I just…

InnerMe: Grab a scrubby. We really need to get to work.

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