Me: There are errors in the novel.
InnerMe: Errors? Like what? You accidentally killed off somebody in Chapter 16? “Everything came to a screeching halt when, the next morning, Bekah woke up dead…”
Me: Aren’t you funny. No, the story’s solid. I mean formatting errors. And some typos.
InnerMe: You knew that would happen.
Me: But that doesn’t mean I wanted it to.
InnerMe: And you’re going to get them corrected.
Me: But there will still be copies floating around with errors!
InnerMe: But your whole story is about how you don’t have to be perfect!
Me: Well, yeah, but I’m not selling these copies to God. People are notoriously lax when it comes to extending grace toward novels.
InnerMe: Ahem. Like… you?
InnerMe: Let’s discuss the books you’ve verbally shredded over the years because they didn’t meet your exalted standards…
Me: Let’s don’t.
Me: Shut up! I said my story is solid! Twilight has some serious plot problems, like…
InnerMe: Forget I mentioned it. Please. All I’m saying is that you might be dreading a taste of your own medicine.
Me: That’s a cliche.
InnerMe: If the shoe fits…
Me: I can’t believe my inner voice speaks in cliches!
InnerMe: Seriously, are you just going to sit around stewing about some errors that you’re going to fix but can’t right at this moment?
Me: Well… I could stew about the fact that the house is a wreck too.
InnerMe: The house is always messy.
Me: I know, and I’m fine with that in general. But it’s reached a unacceptable level of messy.
InnerMe: We can fix that! Right now!
Me: Yes! You are totally right! CONQUER THE MESS!
InnerMe: And… sorry about the cliches.
Me: It’s okay. It’s the thought that counts. Oh my gosh, did I just…
InnerMe: Grab a scrubby. We really need to get to work.
One thought on “The Inner Dialogue of an Indie Author”
Bahaha this is hilarious